Kid Conversations: Let’s Talk About Sex
Cate and Eden happily played Barbie’s all morning on Saturday. Eventually I called them downstairs for lunch, and as they sat down Catie (5yrs) said:
“When I grow up I’m going to have SEX!”
And Eden (7yrs) replied:
“Yeah. And our Barbies are upstairs having sex right now!”
Everyone in the room was considerably shocked, but I managed to play it cool.
Me: Yep. You’ll probably have sex when you group up.
Eden: When?
Paul (immediately): When you are THIRTY SIX!
By this point, Souren (15yrs) is on the floor laughing.
Me: What do you mean “when,” Eden?
Eden: You know…like when I’m ten I get to have my ears pierced, when I’m 13 I’ll be a teenager…
Me: Well Eden, there’s a time and a place for every thing and that place is called college.
Cate: Or when you get married.
Me: Yeah, that’s good to.
Paul: Which will be THIRTY SIX!
The next day I decided to have a little sex lesson review with Eden while she was getting ready for school.
Me: Eden, let’s talk a little bit about sex, okay?
Eden: Sure Momma. (Hopping up to sit on the bathroom counter.)
Me: Well, you know that sex is sometimes called making love right?
Eden: Nope. Why?
Me: Because you are supposed to do it with someone you love and because it’s supposed to be very loving. Like the Barbies, they are only having sex with Ken because they are in love right?
Eden: Oh yeah Mommy, and they are getting married!
Me: Great! And did you know that having sex/making love is how you make babies, right?
Eden: Oh yes Mommy. The egg and the sperm and all that stuff.
Me: And did you also know it feels good?
Eden: IT DOES?!?!
Me: Yeah Eden, it feels nice and that’s why people like to do it…when their bodies are old enough and their minds and emotions are old enough.
Eden: Ohhhhhhh…..I get it! It hurts to HAVE a baby, but not to MAKE a baby!
That is soooo funny! Thanks for sharing. I laughed the hardest when you said sex was for college and your 5 year old said marriage. Too funny!
You are a brave brave women. This conversation scares the shit out of me. I’m glad I still have a little while to prepare… (you did very well)
Too funny…we had a recent update to the conversation in the context of a report on Florida Panthers (which are NOT PANTHERS)…”but what if the girl doesn’t WANT to mate with the boy panther?
See my artistic rendition of syringe…silence from 6year old…does the male get sleeping medicine to get the seeds out?…this was NOT included in the oral presentation.
Isn’t life funny?
[…] “Why doesn’t God just make illness stop? It’s mean of him to let people be sick, I mean, if God can do anything then why doesn’t he fix that problem.” (Notice, this child insists on using the masculine pronoun even though I primarily use the feminine. She doesn’t like new things, this one. In contrast, the other one is bouncing a blue balloon on one finger and insistently shouting, “Yes she does answer us when we pray. She does, Mommy!” Meanwhile, the agnostic one is making cheese sandwhiches and laughing his head off, which is not entirely uncommon.) […]
[…] -I promise to make talking about sex as natural and open as possible. (We’ve already got quite a track record.) […]
[…] -I promise to make talking about sex as natural and open as possible. (We’ve already got quite a track record.) […]